GENDER DIFFERENCES IN COMMUNICATION

Men and women are opposite poles. And yes, like magnets, they also attract each other. Ironically, this ‘difference’ that drew them together is also the exact same element that can create conflict and inflict havoc upon the relationship. One of the big challenges that poses a threat to the smoothness of any relationship is a person’s ability to communicate.
Communication is an art that needs a delicate balancing. There should be an equilibrium between verbal and nonverbal messages. Men by nature are more of thinkers than talkers. When a problem arises, they tend to be task-oriented and less responsive in communication. When they say that they want to think first before saying anything, they really mean it. That’s why they find it irritating when women lash everything out on them, demanding to talk right away. On the other hand, when a woman says that she needs some space to think, she doesn’t really want to be left alone. She wants to be given attention or to be pursued. That’s why she easily gets furious when a guy quits wooing her. The problem becomes bigger and bigger. The root cause? Communication gap.
Men also tend to be honest to the point of bluntness. While women are endowed with supreme prowess with words, men are rather precise and explicit. That’s why they’re oftentimes guilty of giving monosyllabic responses. For them, the equation is simple: black is black and white is white. Women, however, love speaking in riddles. They’re huge fans of figures of speech and hyperbole is one of their all-time favorites. In short, they find this equation amusing: “When I say black, it’s actually white. I’m not gonna give you the clues. It’s up to you to find out.”
Who says that infidelity is the main cause of increase in divorce rates? Men and women are created differently. God intended this difference not to make them become like cats and dogs, North Korea and South Korea, Barack Obama and Osama Bin Laden, Tom and Jerry, Dallas and Miami, so on and so forth...Their uniqueness from each other is suppose to create an aura of mystique that will attract them to each other. He gave them opposite attributes because He wants them to complement each other as partners.
Because of this, both genders should place high importance on healthy communication patterns. A good communicator knows when to talk and when to shut up. The problem with us is the fact that when we hear the word “communication”, we immediately nurse a picture of ourselves talking and talking and talking. What we omitted in the scene is the fact that psychiatrists gave emphasis on silence as one of most helpful elements of therapeutic communication. So the next time that you want to open your mouth, remember that God gave us two ears and one mouth because He wants us to listen twice as much as we talk.
Transparency is the key to resolve communication problems. The day we get past the level of cliché conversations and move on to honest discussions of our feelings is the day we would finally attain a more stable, refreshing, and dynamically secure relationship.
At the end of the day, what matters most is not what we said, but how we said it.